"i'm rather dyspeptic this morning" --uncle screwtape

Our old college friend Sioux visited us yesterday, all the way from colorado springs where she works with ben and robin pasley of 100 portraits/enter the worship circle/blue renaissance. She's on the same journey we are on--asking many of the same questions, coming up against many of the same barriers, finding similar criticism and support. She's wonderful, a fellow pilgrim. And she spouted off some insights yesterday that struck me: "In the church machine, it's easier to not relate--to turn on your 'Christian' switch, go into the building, say your 'Hellos' and 'I'm fines' to everyone, sit back and be moved by music and message, and then walk out an hour or two later back into your 'Normal' life." "When I'm in a room with six or seven people who know me, who are committed to me as a person, it's hard to fake being okay. They see the 'ouch' or 'ugh' on my face, even if I try to hide it." "I don't understand it when people ask me 'Did you go to church this week?' right in the middle of our small group meeting. I always think 'Hello! I am the Church! How do I go to myself?' But then I remember that even just a few months ago I still believed that the Church was a building or many buildings or an event instead of the Body of Christ which can only be people and relationships."