Sometimes you can't make it on your own

My wife rocks! She sprung her early Christmas present on me--U2's new album. I guess she'd been keeping it a secret for a while but read this blog and...viola!...or is it violin!? I don't know where Bono gets this stuff. When I first heard "Bad"--I must have been 14 at the time--I thought This guy is amazing. He never once mentions drugs but you can tell that he's trying to deal with the havoc that addictions reek on friends and family, as he more or less screams "I'm wide awake" in the chorus. The song is heavy with grief and frustration at not being able to do anything about the situation, the addiction, or to stop the friend from killing themselves. Whether it was because drugs and alcohol tore my family apart too or just because I was an angst-ridden teenager, I fell in love with the song the moment I heard it. But with the advent of Achtung, Baby in 1991, I thought Bono had traded in this out-and-out earnestness for more sly songwriting. "Acrobat," "The First Time," and "Wake Up Dead Man" were soul-searching, it's true. But, for me, nothing really had the larynx-stretching gravitas of "Bad." Nothing said "I'm partially responsible for this and it kills me" the way that song does. I have that feeling again about "Sometimes you can't make it on your own." This is Bono's heart on his sleeve all over again (if it ever stopped being there). This time, though, Bono is able to be equally earnest not only about social problems but familial ones as well. The scary thing, of course, is that I can see myself in this song as much as in "Bad." I think Bono agrees that this deep-seated pain doesn't get better in a snap-of-the-fingers type of way. I'm not even sure that God wants us to heal all the way--there's too much value in the pain for humbling the proud, for bringing strength through (not despite) weakness. And in "Sometimes you can't make it on your own," Bono places his loss and weakness out there like a sacrifice for all to see. It's been almost 9 years since I lost my dad, but as I get older, I--like Bono sings--see him when I look in the mirror, when I hold my daughter (who has strikingly nordic characteristics), when I furrow my eyebrows while thinking like he used to, when I get irrationally angry, when I get excited about football or snow or halloween. He's more around the longer he's gone, it seems. I'm definitely not one for "sensing presences" or even for the maudlin Mike and the Mechanics "In the Living Years" stuff (at least not most of the time) but that's some heavy s---, man! So my take home message for today is: Bono...wow. Good stuff. Thanks, B, for the album, DVD, etc. Ah, who am I kidding..."In the Living Years" always makes me tear up. "In the Living Years" -- Mike and the Mechanics

Every generation blames the one before And all of their frustrations come beating on your door I know that I'm a prisoner to all my father held so dear I know that I'm a hostage to all his hopes and fears I just wish I could have told him in the living years More crumpled bits of paper filled with imperfect thoughts Stilted conversations, I'm afraid that's all we've got You say you just don't see it, he says it's perfect sense You just can't get agreement in this present tense We all talk a different language, talking in defence Say it loud, say it clear, you can listen as well as you hear It's too late when we die to admit we don't see eye to eye So we open up a quarrel between the present and the past We only sacrifice the future, it's the bitterness that lasts So don't yield to the fortunes you sometimes see as fate It may have a new perspective on a different date And if you don't give up and don't give in you may just be okay Say it loud, say it clear, you can listen as well as you hear It's too late when we die to admit we don't see eye to eye I wasn't there that morning when my father passed away I didn't get to tell him all the things I had to say But I think I caught its spirit later that same year I'm sure I heard his echo in my baby's new-born tears I just wish I could have told him in the living years Say it loud, say it clear, you can listen as well as you hear It's too late when we die to admit we don't see eye to eye.

(Geez, how many poor-me messages can I post?!?)