"Christian" prophecy to poke fun at

What is the point of doing this? Simple, really--there's "the main and the plain" (which admittedly is neither sometimes) and then there's the really marginal and esoteric. My guess is that the marginal and esoteric distracts from doing the main and the plain. Therefore it should be scorned. Or at least posted here. Rapture letters Bush Sr. and Jr., member of secret quasi-Satanist cabal America and eschatology More money for the LaHaye/Jenkins Swiss bank account The New World Order Christian Zionism


Anonymous Anonymous said...


your latest post brings many thoughts to my head.

First, i hope that fellow commentors will not make fun of the web page creators. i think prophecy is a very serious subject that needs to be studied. the problem is that our ability to intrepret with clairty is difficult. as an example, prophesy is better discerned after the fact than before/during the moment.

also, for the fellow chritians, can we pray for people who focus exclusively on the not-yet of the kingdom to be mindful of the "today" part of God's kingdom? the reverse is true, all of us who neglect prophetic scriptures need to remember that end-time prophesy is there for a reason.

and finally, implicit in many of these pages are doctrinal problems such as king james only beliefs; literalism outside of the original language (reading into the english text something that is unique to our generation and foreign to the original authors; and finally, an egocentric attitude that people who think just liek the authors will be the only ones in heaven.

any takers for discussion?


6/06/2005 6:21 AM  
Blogger John McCollum said...

Dear God,

Please do not let me be baited by Erik. I'm working so hard at not being scornful and judgmental.

But, God, it's just so damn fun.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

P.S. Thank you for not sending me to hell for cussing.

6/06/2005 9:16 AM  
Blogger brian estabrook said...

Dear God,

That is arguably the funniest prayer I've read in my life.

I mean, damn.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

6/06/2005 5:06 PM  
Blogger brian estabrook said...

Okay, seriously though.

Here is what I think in response to Matt's points:

Firstly, prophecy IS a serious and heavy issue that deserves careful consideration and deliberation. The problem with these and other websites is that they interpret and extrapolate things from the text that we really can't say with any certainty are there. This is questionable at best and outright wrong at worst. Here is my eschatology: Jesus is coming. We should spread the Gospel and the Kingdom community as best we can through the Spirit before He gets here. I don't understand the reasons for all the complication like 'pre-trib' and 'amillenialism'... Does it affect the way we are to carry out the Kingdom and Gospel today? No. So leave it alone and lets move onto things that matter.

Your second point is a major issue in my church.. Neglecting the HERE and NOW version of the Kingdom and focusing exclusively on the future and complete Kingdom. Many christians are missing the 'both-and' perspective here, and even worse they have no clue that they're missing it. NO wonder so many Christians have trouble knowing what God wants them to do.. they thing we're just supposed to sit on our asses until Tim LaHaye come ba.. oh.. I meant when Jesus comes back. So, yes. Let us pray for this issue.. and make sure that it is squared away in our own lives.

So, that is my basic knee-jerk reaction to your points. Hope this makes some sense..

6/06/2005 5:20 PM  
Blogger e said...

Dear God,
Please do not shut down this blog supernaturally on account of all the freaking swearing or quasi-swearing.
Gosh dern it all to heck!
Farging iceholes!

The end.

6/07/2005 7:18 PM  
Blogger John McCollum said...

Modern farmer. Go fudge yourself.

6/08/2005 7:03 AM  

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