hi there! this is where i admit to some huge fault and then ask for advice speaking the truth in love is a hard balance for me. i seem to either want to just say something loving and ignore the truth because it's too hard or (much more often) want to point to the truth and then that comes across as so unloving. b and i had this lengthy argument (i finally got stressed out and left the conversation--a bad move!) about the way i say things to people. like, if you see someone who calls themselves a christian and they are deliberately putting themselves in a situation that may cause them to sin, do you tell them that? how do you say it? i'm just so insensitive when it comes to this stuff because i usually think "how would i want them to say this to me?" and that usually is answered by"in a direct way, without beating-around-the-bush." but then what if they would really like it to be more gentle and indirect? i'm so bad at this stuff. here's an example of what i mean: if someone has been an alcoholic for years and they recently gave up drinking and then they tell you they're going back to their favorite pub with their old drinking buddies (not including you) and some other drinkers who they really want to impress and they're going to order shots of tequilla for everyone, including themselves, and then NOT DRINK.... how do you respond? (this is not the actual situation but an analogy). i guess my response is to be like, "what are you doing!?!?! don't you know that you will end up hurting yourself and others?!?!?" but b's point was that there's no way to know for sure that they're going to actually drink the drink and therefore you can't call just going into the situation sin.... i feel like it's deliberate ignorance, and if it's not sin (in a black/white sort of way), then it's got to be dark grey. blah. i hate feeling caught like this...between my natural reaction and then this other way. so, here you are, world.... this is (just one of) erik's massive struggles....