hey there man! long time no blog! I don't think any of your questions negate any of the things we've been talking about or writing about. We're all asking the same question: what does it mean to be a follower of an obscure, Palestinian man who died 2,000 years ago? That is the same question that most people will ask in their lifetimes (the ones who hear about his life, anyway)--and the most intrusive of all questions. That question makes demands--huge demands. No other person claimed to take the sins of the world upon himself unto death. No other person claimed that death could not hold him. No other person has been purported to have been raised from the dead (without a human agent to do the "raising"), who then walked around with the same people who watched him die for several weeks before disappearing. No other person claimed that the Spirit that he shared with his Father--who also happens to be the Creator and Judge of the Universe--would revisit his followers to dwell within them. So, as Francis Schaeffer used to say, Yeshua bar Yosef of Nazareth, in the Roman province of Palestine fulfilled the Jewish prophecies of old by demonstrating the claims and the character of the Infinite-Personal God. By doing so, he showed the world--both spiritual and physical--that God wished to condescend himself into relationship with individual people, that God so loved this messed up Earth that he was willing to go to absurd lengths to win the love of the sheep for the Shepherd, to destroy death and suffering, to make things "make sense", etc., etc. Because he's both infinite and personal, he makes claims on the lives of every individual and every group, nation, people, etc. That's very confrontational of him, no? But to try to cease this rambling, or to at least give it a point, you are an ambassador for this Messiah. And your ambassadorship is about "making disciples of all nations." This has less to do with preaching propositional truth correctly or relating personal experiences with this man's Spirit (though some find those things compelling) then it has to do with becoming a servant, a "little Christ," a revolutionary, a caretaker, one who loves at their own expense and even in spite of themselves. This is the kingdom. Not that we loved God, but that he loves us--so we can love each other. So, if I can be brutally honest, yes, to a degree your time here was a make-believe world where people thrust you into positions of leadership inside of the Christian bubble because you are nice and good looking and can play guitar well. When you are outside of that context, everything will be harsher. Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble." But he followed this up not with "so avoid the world" but with "But take heart, for I have overcome the world." It's a big difference between "shelter yourself" and "love your neighbor." So to sum up: how is your life different then theirs? Not just "what do I believe that is different?" But "How does my life reflect the gospel? How is the Good News shown through my daily life?" Earlier, you were saying the answer is "I don't know." And even though I think you do know and there ARE some things that make you different in your behavior than the kids you are around, maybe one of the things you need to take more seriously (and this is not a condemnation, just a response to your earlier assertion that you're not sure there is anything different about you) your nature as an ambassador through the things you buy, the words you speak, the TV you watch (or don't), the way you spend your time, the way you respond to authority, the car you drive--the little things that make a person who they are--and how these things are shaped by the testimony and life of a man that died and yet lives inside of you. I'm not saying you need to be frickin Mother Theresa to these kids...I'm just saying that your ambassadorship for Christ centers more around who you are in front of them than what you preach or who you were in Columbus.